Logan – Round 3, Birthday, Mom & Dad

Back at the hospital for Chemo Round 3

Yesterday morning Amanda and AJ took Logan back into the hospital for his third round of chemo. Round 3 has Logan receiving his chemo twice a day (3am and 3pm) for 5 days. This compares to the 10 days and 8 days for the previous rounds. But – and this is significant – the chemo is about 10 times the strength of what Logan has previously endured. Logan’s little body is being absolutely hammered with poison that will save his life. We have no idea how he will react to this, and I ask for your prayers.

Before Logan received the first chemo dose at 3p yesterday, he was put under anesthesia for a bone marrow biopsy. Results from the biopsy are expected over the next several days, and what we want to hear is that Logan remains in remission. His feeding tube was also reinserted. Despite Logan’s champion eating, he did lose a bit of weight during the hospital holiday. So the feeding tube will provide the calories that he needs. Logan’s visit with us without a feeding tube allowed him the freedom to roam wherever he chose, which was wonderful to see. We also got to be on the front lines as he developed his walking skills. The record during the visit was an unaided 10 steps.

Happy 1st Birthday!

Today is Logan’s first birthday, and he will spend it at the hospital receiving chemotherapy. Writing that sentence welled up my eyes with tears. It is just so unfair that Logan and his fellow pediatric cancer patients are in such battles. And yet when I look at Logan, he has that wry smile, that little smirk that just melts my heart. No, he does not realize the battle that he is in, but he is enduring it with the help of the medical staff and his family.

Logan’s birthday was celebrated early at our home Monday. The theme was Winnie the Pooh. Pictures posted on social media show that theme in the beautiful and delicious cakes made by Aunt Casey, and the big red balloon and custom shirts by Aunt Bridget, and the Tigger, Piglet, Pooh and Eeyore stuffed animals. Quarantined grandparents Mike and Kim and me and Donna, as well as Aunt Casey and Uncle Chris attended. N95-masked guest appearances by Aunt Bridget and Uncle Jeff were a treat. As with most first birthday parties, Logan was mystified with the happenings. And yet it was great to celebrate.

Mom and Dad

This was the second visit by the little family between chemo sessions. The visits are both joyful and more work than you can imagine. After being a part of those 7 days and nights, I must tell you about the love and care and partnership of my son AJ and my daughter-in-law Amanda. They both care for Logan without question, without complaint, and without hesitation. They ask each other for help as needed, and the requests are completed with joy. Watching them work together to care for their son is a model I wish could be bottled and given to others struggling with such responsibilities. I think of caregivers who accept long-term care needs for family members for various reasons, and all of this is a labor of love. We saw it in Amanda and AJ every day and night.

Nights

During the day in addition to playing with Logan, we all focused on feeding and hydrating him. At night because his sleep has been so disrupted by the hospital care, it was a merry-go-round of parents and grandparents taking turns comforting him. That worked for several nights, until Logan started screaming bloody murder during the night. One night around 1:30a, I tried my best to comfort him, but no dice. Then Amanda came out, and she was able to immediately calm him down. Watching her love my grandson the way she did was magical. She handed him back to me to get some water for Logan and – screaming bloody murder. When Amanda took him back – calm. So that night it was Amanda’s job to rock him to sleep.

The next night Logan was awake and AJ was with him. I came out and asked if I could relieve AJ so he could sleep. AJ hopefully said, “We can try…” And so Logan came into my arms and – screaming bloody murder. Handed back to AJ – calm. We were onto something. As babies develop they apparently go through “leaps,” stages of development that are somewhat predictable. We believe that a leap was happening and impacting Logan’s reactions.

Even the next morning Logan was beside himself with me and Donna – until he fully woke up and realized who we were. Then he was his happy little smiling self. That Donna and I could not give Amanda and AJ a little relief those nights was disappointing. However the last night they were with us, Tuesday night, was different. Both Donna and I were able to take turns in the middle of the night and Logan allowed it. That was good for all of us as Amanda and AJ could sleep, and me and Donna could get one more night’s snuggle with Logan.

Amanda and AJ are just wonderful parents. I pray that they continue to have an unending supply of love and strength and patience to care for Logan as partners. Thank you all for your prayers and support.