Mary Archives -

Playing Cards

Uncle Bernie O’Grady, Uncle Ed Crotty, Mom and Dad

I grew up playing cards. It started with nickel and dime rummy at the kitchen table with my parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts/uncles – whoever was around. It’s just what we did. And as you can see from the pic, the cards started long before I was around. I believe this is in the 87th/Wood basement in Chicago where my Mom was raised. This picture includes my Uncle Bernie O’Grady who died a young man. I vaguely remember visiting Uncle Bernie at school in Carbondale, Illinois and that he lived on a houseboat. (Some O’Grady can check me on that.) My Uncle Ed Crotty was married to Aunt Kay, my Mom’s sister. Finally, my Dad, in his favorite pose at the poker table, raking it in.

I am finding that old photos of everyday life like these are rare. Because cameras were for special occasions. And the camera was a thing you had to remember to bring with you, remember to take a picture, and wait for the roll of 12 or 24 or 36 exposures to be used. Then of course the roll was taken to Walgreens and left there for a week to be developed. Hopefully, some of the photos turned out. Were in focus with everyone’s eye open. Without the photog’s finger in front of the lens.

Now, of course, everyone has a camera all the time and everyday life is constantly captured. And instantly photos are judged for quality and shared. There will not be someone like me in 40 years sifting through polaroids. They will be hopefully – if we save properly – sifting through digital files.

What’s your name?

For my Mom and Dad’s 70th anniversary, my sons Kevin and Jeff decided to surprise them by travelling to Chicago for the weekend. Certainly the distance limits how often we are able to visit, but the pandemic stopped all the visits. So Kevin and Jeff have not had the chance to see their grandparents in person for a couple of years. Watching them talk brought me great joy.

After Jeff and Kevin left the first night to hang out with cousins Tom and Mike, my Dad said to me, “I think I asked Jeff his name.” Then he followed up with, “Jeff must think I am an idiot.” I assured my Dad that that was not the case.

I texted Jeff, and his response was, “Yeah, Grandpa did ask. First he asked what my name was and I said ‘Jeff.’ And then Grandpa asked ‘Jeff who?’ I thought he was messing with me, but I answered ‘Beatty.’ It surprised me. I could have handled it better.”

Know that my parent’s minds are in great shape, and yet when you are in your 90’s you now and then forget things. (I forget things right now. ) Also know that Jeff thought his Grandpa was messing with him, well, because his Grandpa would sometimes mess with people – joke around with them. That this misunderstanding took place was really fantastic to me. It acknowledges who each of them was and is. It shows the reality and uncertainty of aging. And it is an example of the grace that people can show each other as things change.

And when they met again the next day, they each greeted the other with, “Hi, Mr. Beatty.” Perfect.

Glamour Shot

Mary Beatty at 91, and as St. Laurence Mom

My Mom was involved. Involved in church and school at St. Bede’s Parish, and in the Mother’s Club at St. Laurence High School. Her model of service has certainly guided me to be a part of my community.

The St. Bede Altar Guild was a service/social organization for women of the parish. During my recent visit to Chicago we enjoyed pizza from Vito & Nick’s, and Mom recounted that after the St. Bede Altar Guild meetings, the “meeting after the meeting” would be held at Vito & Nicks. (Best thin crust pizza in Chicago, by the way, to this day.)

As for St. Laurence, the Mother’s Club always had schemes (events?) to raise money for the school. Among them every year there was a dinner with a talent show sort of program, and the Moms would sing and dance. The picture Mom is holding is one of the glamour shots that were taken of the performers for the program. Gotta be fun, right? What I would pay for a video of any one of those shows.